Well, we're not going to spend New Years in DC...again. Instead, we'll spend it here, getting drunk and blowing in the breathalyzer I got him for Christmas, listening to Amanda's (aka "I bet my life's more fucked up than yours - want to see") stories while thinking how awesome it would have been being at the monuments at night, and while realizing that he couldn't get past a grudge enough to spend one night in my dream city for the second year in a row. But good news - we'll get to visit DC sometime next year, and we'll be engaged within 6 months to a year.

He asked me tonight if I would say yes. Well, of course. How could I say no? We agreed on sapphires instead of diamonds. And he actually danced an entire dance with me last night at the company Christmas party.

There's only one thing I can think right now...he's planned well enough to provide a great life for my future children. Can I ask for more? Yes. Should I? No.

My brother's going to die soon. He got in a fight (really, his drunk irresponsible excuse for a girlfriend shoved him into it) and spent the night in the hospital. He's now vowing revenge. It's weird to think that my brother's going to end up either dead or in prison for killing someone, but I don't think there's any other paths for him. Which is a shame considering how much my mother tried to open all these doors for him.

It doesn't feel like Christmas, and I'm afraid it won't again.